Bigger than Life

Daily Prompt: Too Big To Fail

by michelle w. on May 17, 2013

Tell us about something you would attempt if you were guaranteed not to fail (and tell us why you haven’t tried it yet).

Pink_Butterfly-369x319

Too Big to Fail

Life for the last decade or so has been challenging to me. In my younger years, I had all of the reckless confinedce that any youth would have.  I faced all that I encountered with the KNOWING that I would succeed.  I did.. In work at least.  I did, at raising my children when they were young, protecting them from the harsh reality of their home and dad that had chosen to not work, not be home, become an addict (of immense proportions) and I just worked while trying my best at keeping them all together.

Eventually, I wore down.  My energy started to fail me.  I was tired.  My marriage was, despite all the effort and hope I had put into it, worse than a disaster.  My kids were showing the signs of coming from such a destructive environment.  I left, eventually, but it was too late in so many ways.  I cannot go back in time, but I wish that I had the courage to face the things that I really need to face with faith, hope and the sense of knowing that with God, it will be ok.

I want to fix my life. I would, if I knew where to start and could know that I would not fail again.

  1. My eldest daughter.  The face of an angel, a heart of gold, she was bright, charismatic and beautiful.  I took her and her three siblings out of the house when she was twelve.. But the addiction had already started with her (at the time, I had no idea).  I would do anything to have her clean and free from the chains of our past.
  2. My youngest daughter.  Like a ray of sunshine, she lights up the room when she enters.  She is charming, bright, beautiful and witty.  I have lost her trust over the last several years.  I miss her more than words can say.
  3. My boys.. They are back on track in life.. In school and working, but I wish I could give them back the years that were so hard on them.
  4. My home.  It needs fixing (a lot) and a good top-to-bottom, which I just never have the strength or stamina to get through.  Yes, I will get through a little, but then there are the bad days and nothing gets done.  I would love for it to be like a normal home again.
  5. My health.  I want to feel better, look better, have more energy.. Or any energy for that matter.  I am tired of kidney stones constantly ravaging me and I just want to be able to function normally again.

Well, that was another “difficult to share” piece, but dang!  I promised myself that I would not compromise when I had to write and that I would write the truth.

I have faith that in time, God will lead me through it.  It just seems bigger than life to me at the moment.  I am glad that He has a plan.. especially when I can’t seem to come up with any more. 

Easter Ellen

13 Comments on “Bigger than Life

  1. Honey, our lives are paralleled in so many ways. I love you, Your favorite Auntie Lorna

    Like

    • I love you too. Thank you for following me on here. It is not easy to always speak the hard things, but it does have the benefit of at least making me keep to a promise I made myself.
      xoxoxox
      Your E

      Like

  2. Pingback: Anything Guaranteed Is Not Appreciated – It Might Even Be Illegal | The Jittery Goat

  3. WOW! You did it, you put yourself and your story out there for the world to see. The weight of the world has no doubt been lifted from your shoulders. I knew there was something we shared but couldn’t put my finger on it. I now know. We share the same marriage experiences! Pretty much identical to each other! Have the faith. God will lead you through it!

    Like

  4. Pingback: Too Big To Fail – The Best Movie of All Time | Khana's Web

    • 🙂 I still have lots of hope and lots and lots of God. It just can be harder to face some things than others at times. You have been through so much.. thank you for your encouragement.

      Like

      • Lets turn that first sentence around.
        GOD has lots of hope and lots and lots of Easter. He is not done with you!
        I can assure you…ASSURE YOU…He knows every hair on your head, He knows you by YOUR name..He knows your beginning and your end. With that being said, He already knows your tomorrow, and your days ahead.
        That is not to say it isn’t hard. But it is our worrying that makes it that way. He says to cast ALL your cares on HIM for He cares for you. Trust me, when you learn to do this, REST will come. Peace will follow. I know I sound preachy. I don’t want to. But it is true. He already knows.
        Get yourself a notebook and start writing to Him. I did. I realized He wanted a friendship with me. Now, I rely on Him more than ever. It’s a relationship He wants. My notebook is where I can write my personal feelings and its between He and I. Tell Him exactly how you feel. You will be amazed at what He shows you. There is no larger love Easter. No larger love.
        And one more thing, we all go through life experiences. Some seem more tragic/traumatic than others but no matter the insult to injury, GOD uses them all to His good. My hardship is no more/less than yours in Gods eyes. Thank Him for whatever it is He is doing in your life. Whatever it is, it will be a huge blessing. I promise you! Big big hugs! I will keep you lifted in prayer.

        Like

        • You are wonderful – thank you so much. I do manage to be thankful – and I do feel His love. I will start to write to Him though – I think that would be the right thing to do. 🙂 thank you so much.

          Like

          • No thank you necessary. God’s love is sufficient.
            I have learned in the most humbling way, you can not out love Him. And basically, LOVE is truly all he asks of us.

            I was so low…another story for another day…I felt the urge to write. I grabbed a notebook. It took a little bit of time before I even started writing. But when I did, it all came out. Hurt, anger, sadness, love, hate, all of it. It all came out over a period of several weeks. But through devotions and my bible apps. (I’m not good at reading my bible) He showed me through even those He was speaking. It WOWED me. DO IT!! God doesn’t pick and choose who he speaks to. Or loves more. It’s all going to be ok.

            Like

I love and appreciate feedback. Feel free to let me know what you think. Bless you lots, Easter Ellen

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

everyday deelights

capturing your deelightful day

When Women Inspire

Highlighting Inspiring Women Around the World

Remind Your Mind

Navigating the journey to higher awareness.

New Millionaires Mindset

It's all in your head

Be Inspired

You're Here..., Because You Inspire God

HASTYWORDS

Turning Tears & Laughter into Words

forgottenmeadows

thoughts from my mind to yours

eastelmhurst.a.go.go

I have a hyperactive imagination.Welcome to my world. You can get here by way of Astoria Blvd.,Sunrise Hwy or Wyoming Avenue~

dribblingpensioner

Just another pensioner with his thoughts if he can remember them

Joke for today

A NEW JOKE EVERY DAY

RANDOM!!!

This is where i go to a random mode

Don Charisma

because anything is possible with Charisma

- LozziiRAWR - Quotes

Quotes that mean something

Conversations Around the Tree

friends and followers discuss random ideas

Storybook Art Café Blog

Every Life is a Storybook Unfolding! Learn about faith, hope & love through Scripture, stories & art

Tipsy Lit

the publishing imprint of author ericka clay

Covey View

a covey of bloggers presenting a view of their world.

3 words

working with three words a day

Today's Author

Fostering a community of creative writers through articles, comments, writing prompts and a healthy, supportive environment.

The WordPress.com Blog

The latest news on WordPress.com and the WordPress community.

Meredith's Reveries

Think, read, write

The blossoming fall

Dealing with the everyday issues of school and friends.

Tripping Over Pebbles No More

Rants, raves and ramblings about whatever takes my fancy

Hortus Closus

Pour vivre heureux, vivons cachés

Triumphant Wings

A Journey with Lupus & Antiphospholipid Syndrome

jaybluepoems

This WordPress.com site is the cat’s pajamas

MBK Wildlife Photography

Wildlife Photography and Bird Photography Blog, technique and pictures

Living With No Excuses

The Way Forward!

Hostess At Heart

Sharing life one recipe at a time

From the North to the South

And all the stops along the way

Gail Masinda

Music Studio

Dare to Dream, Live to Write

Closer to the dream. One word at a time.

My Renaissance

This is my journey of constantly being reborn into a better self every day. ~

boy with a hat

writing as a way of life

Amongst the crowd

A truthful and honest journey

{This Is Life}

... it doesn't get better than this!

Cladach Publishing

Producing and Providing Christian Books from Our Shore to Yours

Tell Me About It

Tell Me About It

Angelart Star

The beautiful picture of angels makes you happy.

Willis Island Walking

The story of a completed walk for charity around a desert island in the Coral Sea

photo roberts blog

ich zeige euch meine stadt wie ich sie sehe

Wandering Iris

Wandering through life, getting better every day.

Lins Doodles

Illustration Friday challenge, artwork, mixed media, drawings, photo challenges

ArtKorppi

ends 28.3.2016?

Uncle Tree's House

Putting music to words, and words to pictures ~

Why? Matters

Why do I do what I do?

%d bloggers like this: